Miscellaneous rambling, and bragging about my kids.

Man, I just can't do it.  There's no way I can transcribe an entire ensemble musical. 🙁  It'll take me forever, I'll still get parts of it wrong, and it'll still be impossible to read because of all the group numbers. 

How was it?  Honestly, I really liked it. The first big number (and Dr. Kelso's only real contribution) was pretty painful, but it got steadily better. The last numbers in particular were very good indeed. The storyline is even good – woman comes in with a mysterious illness that makes her hear music when people talk to her.  Apparently a true story, as many Scrubs episodes often are. 

Man, the lyrics to some of the songs are really pretty forced.  There's a whole song about poo, for heaven's sake.  Although it does end up sounding very Monty Python.  I'm sure people will love it, of course. Didn't do much for me. The Dr. Cox Rant is probably the best song, in my book. Dr. Cox can't sing worth beans, but he delivered a musical rant very well. The Turk and Carla Tango is very nice as well.  "Guy Love" is disqualified because it's been available on iTunes for a few weeks now as a trailer. The finale ends up being a pretty slow, serious number which is very good, including a solo from the patient with the problem.

(P.S. – I think it's funny that when I pause the show, Tivo shows me what is apparently an ad for Puerto Rico. Given the Turk and Carla number, that is. I wonder if it was context sensitive or just a coincidence?)

Anyway, I'll see if I can transcribe some of the better lines.

Oh, well how about this for an explanation:  she's cuckoo pants.

Hey Ms. Miller, we just need a stool sample.
  Why do you need a stool sample, if you think I'm just a nut?
Cuz the answer's not in your head my dear, it's in your butt.

You see, everything comes down to poo.

All across the nation, we trust in defecation.

Just be a man and eat some bran, and drop the kids off at the pool.

I was shot!

  Check the poo.

Homeless guy threw poo in my eye!

  Check the poo.

Mine or his?

  First him, then you.

Dr. Cox, I'm not crazy.
  Am I still singing?
Singing like a bird.

Still, you're not nearly as bad as her.  Do you know how much you annoy me?  The answer is, alot.  Should I list the reasons why?  Well I don't see why not.  It's your hair your nose your chinless face you always need a hug, not to mention all the manly appletini's that you chug.  That you think I am your mentor just continues to perplex, and oh my god stop telling me when you have nerdy sex!
  By the way last time Kim was in town, we got some appletini's and poured them on her good parts.
See newbie that's the thing you do that drives me up a tree, cuz no matter how I rant at you you never let me be. So I'm stuck with all your daydreaming, your wish to be my son.  It makes me suicidal and I'm not the only one.  No I'm not the only one… 

   It all started with a penny in the door.  There was a hatred I had never felt before.  So now I'll make him pay, each and every day.  Until that moussed hair little nuance is no more.

So now that is why I call you names like Carol Jane and Sue.  Like Moesha Kim and Lilly and Suzanne and Betty Lou.  Regardless of the names I pick my feelings are quite clear, your a pain in every day of every month of every year. 
      Dr. Cox you gotta help me cuz I really am distressed, can't you find another option won't you run another test?
If you want some kind of favor really any kind of favor please just get me peace and quiet from this godforsaken pest.
        I think what my bumper buddy is trying to say…
      Shut your cakehole Marybeth, or I swear to god I'll shut it soon!
Congratulations, we'll schedule your test this afternoon.

 Sometimes you're better off not knowing, but this isn't one of those times.  Your world's become a musical, and your doctors speak in rhymes.

Guy Love, that's all there is.  Guy Love, he's mine I'm his.  There's nothing gay about it in our eyes.

We're closer than the average man and wife.
  That's why our matching bracelets say Turk and J.D.
You know I'll stick by you for the rest of my life.
  You're the only man who's ever been inside of me!
Whoa, whoa, I just took out his appendix.

It's like I married my best friend.
  But in a totally manly way!

JD, I want to live by myself.
  Ok, no problem.  Turk, with you relay this?
    That means you guys are no longer talking.

We're as close as the vena cava and the aorta. We're best friends just like amoxicillin and clavulanic acid. The tibia the fibia the left and right ventricle, a hypodermic needle and a latex tourniquet. Diverticulitis and a barium enema!

Turk, I want to come back to work, it's who I am.
  Oh.  Well I always thought family was the most important thing to Puerto Ricans.

Don't make a big todo, I was simply testing you.
  Then why'd you tell JD our baby's blaxican?
Babe you know I know the truth.
  Well I'll need a little proof, so list all you know about me or no sex again.

Your name is Carla, you are Latina.  You're a nurse, your mother's dead and wait…I got it! Three sisters.
  Turk!
Two sisters?  Well I'm sure you have a brother who's a huge jerkoff.

Tell me what's my middle name?
  Ok I'm tired of this game.

What's going to happen?  What does the future hold?  So many things that I've put off, assuming I had time.

Plan for tomorrow, because we swear to you, you're going to be ok.

You're going to be ok, that's what's going to happen.

By the way, who's the best singer?  You know, in your head.  Don't let the fact that I went to theatre camp affect your decision.

Sometimes when you get what you want, you end up missing what you left behind.  Whether it's your roommate, or time spent with your child.  Or even the music you used to hear in your head.

More Scrubs Quotes… 

Asha over at ParentHacks reviews what appears to be the state of the art in baby monitors. For $200, it had better be! The built in music and night light are a nice touch, actually. We're always juggling battery operated thingamies that make light and noise, so something that does it by being plugged into the wall would be a benefit.

Of course, with three of em to monitor, we had to go for a different unit that had three transmitters and two receivers. But my brother in law just had his first, so maybe he can check this out.

Have you considered growing multiple new pairs of ears?

When you do so, you can then get a super-ipod that plays 8 way stereophonic super sound.

Welcome back to American Idol, and hours and hours of the same old stuff. The audition weeks have become caricatures of what they once were. The bad contestants can't just be bad, they have to be bad and come in costume. And you can spot the good contestants before they ever sing, because there's a whole produced segment about them. Oh look, a Navy guy – let's get footage of his aircraft carrier. Naturally we know that they went to the trouble to get that footage after he was selected.

Every judge (including Jewel) is mean this year, but mostly in a sort of "Oh come on, are you kidding me?" way. It's like they're bored with the whole thing.

They also do that thing that everybody hated last year, where they make a montage of all the bad singers all singing the same song. So, in other words, these people were told that they were horrible, and then told "Sing some more." Most of those people walked out of their audition screaming, cursing and crying…so why would they sing more just so they can be mocked again?

The first night reveals very few good singers at all. But perhaps the worst thing is that every bad singer gets a very lengthy segment. Why? From the minute they open their mouths it's obvious that they're not going anywhere. So why let them sing a complete song, and then keep them around chatting? I was fast forwarding quite a bit.

More American Idol stories…

Technorati: American Idol

Came home from work today, and what is Elizabeth playing with?

Another pair of iPod earbuds.

?!?! That's just spooky. I'm looking at the things, which look exactly like the new pair I just bought, trying to remember when I'd brought them upstairs. I take them downstairs to my car…nope, my new ones are still sitting there.

That makes *5* pairs of these things.

At least I can account for this last pair — the kids really do have earbud headphones that came with some silly transistor radio they'd forgotten. But still, for a minute there I swear to god I though they were multiplying.

What's the name for that thing where you lose your ipod headphones (earbuds, actually), so you go out and buy a new pair (because you walk across town twice every day with them and you need something) for $20, but they're horrible, so you spend a week suffering with them (you can't return things that you stick in your ears, you ever try?) until finally you break down and buy another pair…

…and it's at this point that you think I'm gonna say "You find the original pair you thought you lost", right? Well, yeah. I did, right there in the garage.

BUT THEN I FOUND ANOTHER G$%^&*(D%^&N PAIR that I'd never seen before, sitting right in the junk drawer in the kitchen. That's like, irony squared or something. Alanis Morrisette's got me all confused about what that word's really supposed to mean.

So I now have:

• One ipod
• 2 sets of earbuds that were already in my possession
• 2 sets of earbuds that I've just purchased for $20/per.

If I get one more pair I'm thinking about implementing a day of the week sort of thing. I wonder if I can convince Kerry that now I need to buy more iPods?

Ok, ok, I realize that my search function on this blog software is horrendously bad. I apologize to everybody coming here and hitting the search for "Scrubs quotes". Instead I've made an Episode Guide where you can just get quick access to everything I have. I only really started keeping track in season 5, so I don't have any of the older stuff. But in general people come looking for the newest episodes anyway :). Now that Scrubs is in syndication, I hope to get some quotes down from every episode I can get my hands on. Probably not everything from every episode, but at least the highlights. Maybe I can set something up where people start adding their own or something.

Anyway, have fun.

Great blog. Keep up the good work!

Backyardigans are the best. My daughter was so taken with them that for a span of about three weeks she insisted on being called Tyrone. Luckily it was just a phase.

Aha! Found it. Recently I mentioned Elizabeth's new catchphrase, innoo da tikkamix which I thought was from Wonderpets. I'm pretty sure it's supposed to be "into the thick of it."

Turns out, it's Backyardigans. It's actually a song from the episode "Into the Jungle".. Thanks, Wikipedia!

The Buddha Boy comes into my thoughts at the most interesting times. I can't remember when I first read about him or how I happened onto him. I am intrigued, totally!