[BlogEntry] Scrubs Quotes : My Scrubs

This episode was cute, but one of those that are sort of out-of-time in that they don't really advance any plotlines.  It's like an extra that they have lying around that they can drop in for whatever reason to stall for a week.  Since I'm late this week I had a chance to listen to the NBC podcast that goes with the show. Interesting things I learned:

  • Ken Jennings, who plays Dr. Kelso, has a bad habit of referring to the young Asian ladies who play in his fantasy sequences as "little girls."  Maybe they really are kids, or maybe it's just something that he says, but when you're taking about a massage parlor sequence and a happy ending it's weird to hear him say things like "I could just picture that little girl having to call her mother and tell her what she did today."
  • The guy that plays the delivery man is a writer/producer on the show.
  • This script was the first script written by this particular writer, whose name I forget.  It shows.  It was almost like a tryout.  Here, write a show, but don't advance any of the plotlines, just make it funny.
  • Laverne shouting out her name before smashing Carla's window actually was a geeky reference to the World of Warcraft character of LEEEROYYYY JENKINNSSS!  But you have to be very geeky to get that.

Anyway, on with the show!

 

But call me Grandpa again and you and I are gonna play a little game called "Hide the Wingtip."  There may be a generational gap here, I'll explain.  The wingtip is my shoe, and the hiding place is your ass.

Well, let's see what Enid packed for lunch today.  A stapler and a golf ball.  She's not well.

Cool, Mr. Rabinowitz just kicked it!  Oh don't worry, he put his peep in an electrical socket.  You can't do that.

Dude, I've had a pro bono like all morning.  Something-might-be-wrong five!

Why so awkward?  You never saw a colleague get a happy ending before?
  No, not that happy.
    But thank you, for including us.

I started using that new facial cream made from baby foreskins.

Oh, you think you're funny?
  I do. I always have, ever since I was little. It's one of the reasons I'm a winner.

White people do the craziest things.
  Like bumper stickers.  I don't give a damn what you break for.

Anyway, small favor.  I need your baby.  I'm getting into the baby broker business.  Nothing illicit, I'm just hooking up folks who can't have babies with folks who don't want babies.

If this is your way of trying to make me feel guilty about paving over that Indian burial ground it isn't going to work.  We needed the damn parking spaces!

Hey, Mom.  A guy tried to die on me today, but I didn't let him.  I didn't let him!

Scuse me guys, stealin scrubs here.

Well anyway, since I wasn't willing to do the things you need to do in jail to get narcotics, at least not enthusiastically, I got clean.

I have a game.  Raise your hand if you're full of crap.  Sam, if you don't raise your hand, you're going to lose the game.

Come on man, you don't know how hard it's been to stay straight.
  Been there, brother.

No, it's not bald black doctor.  It's haired, half white half Innuit janitor.

Here's what I want.  I want your baby, we already talked about that.  I want you to tell that new borderline anorexic nurse to eat a sandwich, and then to go salsa dancing with me.  Also I want you to teach me to salsa dance.  I want a pound of frankincense, mostly just to see what it is.  And, lastly, I'm in a little bit of a tiff with the main barista down at Coffee Bucks.  He's not above poisoning me so I'm gonna need you to be my official beverage taster.  Yes?

Nothing ever changes.  The artist formerly known as Prince is still just prince.  My ex-wife is still pretty much my wife.  Grey's Anatomy always wraps up every episode with some cheesy voice over that ties together all of the storylines which incidentally is my least favorite device on television.  Newbie continually will try to violate my no touching policy…uh huh….and Republicans will forever try to raise
  Sneak hug!

(Unga bunga tunga runga, tonga batonga bunga.)

I may have killed you, but I think I was upset about it.

Maybe we should post the transcript of your little "nothing ever changes" rant for the cancer patients in the chemo ward as a little pick-me-up.  Oh and FYI, I happen to like the voiceovers on Grey's Anatomy.  Except for when they're really vague and generic.
  (And so in the end, I knew what Elliot said about the way things were had forever changed the way we all thought about them.)

I don't care what you think, I'm always going to believe the best in people.
  All the best with that, Barbidiot.

Well, tunafish on a sponge.  She's getting closer.

Are you seriously doing the cliched sarcastic slow clap?  Because that's way too 1980s.

Ghost dog!  Ghost dog!

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