Miscellaneous rambling, and bragging about my kids.

So yesterday, Veteran's Day, the kids had no school. The wife asks if I can make a coffee run since she'll be staying in the house all morning (playgroup coming over). This, in turn, means a donut run for the kids. Anybody with young kids knows how this works. You get the right donut. No questions, no options. Each child has a donut preference, and god help you if you mess it up.

My oldest wants a chocolate frosted. With or without sprinkles? Because the chocolate comes two ways. She thinks she's doing me a favor by saying "whatever kind you want to get me, Daddy". But I explain to her through an odd quirk of the universe that the one without sprinkles is a glazed donut, while the one with sprinkles is a plain donut. She opts for glazed and no sprinkles.

My three year old is easy. Pink donut. In this case that means strawberry frosted with sprinkles. Pink donut is like a constant in her universe. She is the Henry Ford of donuts. You can get me whatever flavor you want as long as it's a pink donut.

The boy? He's too young to complain. I get him vanilla frosted just because the geek in me likes ordering the full set of vanilla-chocolate-strawberry.

Before heading off to the donut store, I check my email as I tend to do. And that's where karma kicks me in the ass.

You see, I get to the donut store and wait my turn. And the woman in front of me? Takes all of the pink donuts. There were about 4 left, she got them all as part of a mixed dozen. I asked if there were anymore and was told no. (Where's karma come in? If I hadn't checked my email, I would have been there first, you see.)

Now had I been a smarter person I might have said "Any chance you can leave one of those so my daughter can have it?" Instead I sat there glaring at her, silently and violently wishing death upon her and her whole fat cow high blood pressure stuff her face adults taking donuts from children family. Visions of a parking lot mugging crossed my mind.

I ended up getting her vanilla with sprinkles instead. I came home, head down in shame, having failed one of my children. I explained to her, without looking her in the eye, that a big mean lady had come in before me and taken all the pink donuts. "That's ok Daddy," she said, holding my face. "You can get me chocolate."

Double damnit.

GREAT episode, loved it!  I like how they managed to make it serious, get some real character issues going, while not making it feel over the top and manufactured like most of last season.  The Dr. Cox / Elliot storyline was stupid, but the rest was very good. Janitor and Ted played excellent roles.  And did everybody catch all the throwbacks?

• Way back in Season 1 (I think), Carla told Dr. Cox he has crazy eyes (in the episode where Carla's mom broke her leg).  Here a patient tells him.
• Carla's reference that "I just gave you this same speech two weeks ago" along with a flashback literally to the scene from the episode two weeks ago where she did exactly that.
• JD's brother surprised him last time as well by disguising himself as a patient (when his face was all wrapped in gauze and the Janitor told a story to keep JD busy so that he could watch).

(Nothing in my life could compare to this.)  I'm a dad.
  That's not your kid.
I know, but he reminds me of Sam.
  That's a girl!
Stop ruining it, why do you have to ruin things!  I'm having a moment here!

Since Keith and I broke up I haven't been eating or sleeping well, so I'm down a dress size.
  You look like you've been sick.
Turk that's so sweet.

Damn you Carla and your giant rubber stamps!

Hey, I just dropped my mom off at the mall.  She sits on the seat and then holds on by tucking her hands inside my bike shorts.
  That's disgusting.
Yeah.  Doesn't feel right.

Yeah, I let it run all day so I can leave the air conditioner on.  That way it's nice and cool when I drive home. I gotta gas up sometimes over lunch, but it's worth it.

You know what really sucks?
  Being trapped in an elevator with you while you whine about your stupid life?

Plus, I'm making that 40 minute drive on a scooter.  And if I ever want to bring Sam here, I can't, because his stupid flopsy baby neck isn't strong enough to wear a helmet.

Zombie hug!!

Christopher, thanks again for your help.
 Hey man, if it involves making JD scream like a little girl I am there for you man.

AHHHHHH I'm a monster!
  Takes more planning than that.
    That must be embarrassing for you.
Damnit!

You just told a patient to reduce stress and then you yelled at an intern over coffee?
  You are going to be a huge help when it comes time to write my memoirs.

My first step was going with all hemp underwear, it's awesome!  Except when the hemp oil seeps into your bloodstream, then it's awesomer!

Make it snappy jumpsuit, I'm already late for my nap.

I would like to volunteer my services as environmental officer.
  Will it cost me anything?
No.
  Knock yourself out, hippie.
Groovy.

(Yup, nothing makes my life feel less crappy than hanging out with my loser bro.)

Good question, Turk.
  Thanks.  How come you don't point out when I ask good questions?
    Because I don't love you like he does.
Told you!

If you're doing so well how come you made me buy you lunch?
  I was unaware we needed a reason to score a free meal.

I heard you passed out at work?
  Yeah.  I saw a ghost!
Really?  No way!
  No, but I have to come up with something.  It was so embarrassing.
Ooo, tell people it was your mother's ghost!
  I can't, my mom's still alive.
Bummer.

If you leave a light on I make you eat a battery, or lick a lightbulb.  Your choice.

Bam!
  I'm gonna go with "Ow."

Remember!  Give a hoot!  Don't litter.

Nononono!  Put me the frick down!  Don't you dare put me on that frickin scale!

You!  Come over here and read this number.
  No!  Boom, I will kill your family!  Say goodbye to Baby Boom!

Hypocrisy thy name is….Boom, do you want to finish that for me?  No?  Not smart enough to follow?  It's you, Barbie.  Hypocrisy thy name is you.

You come here with your new job and you give me a car?
 So what?
(Don't say it.)  You're supposed to be the loser, not me.

You know what, JD?  You need to grow up.

He's got crazy eyes.
  I do.  And I'm ok with it.

He expects me to make you drink my mop water.  But since my bucket's all the way downstairs I'm gonna let you off with a warning, provided you promise never to tell Ted.  Yes?
  No.
I'm gonna take that as a yes.  That's it, drink it down, baby, suds too!  You've learned your lesson.

Do you think I need to grow up?
  Wow.  You dream your whole life for that moment and then when it comes you're just, you're just not ready for it.  Here goes.  The answer is a sincere, emphatic, 100% definitive never been so sure of anything in my life unequivocal, yes.  And the fact that you came to me means everyone else thinks so too.  Am I right?

Wow.  It's not every doctor that'd take a hot bod like yours and go all jiggly for a patient.

Hey!  Why wouldn't you throw that in recycling?
  The recycling bin is way over there!
What happened to you?  You were gonna change the world, man?
  I've learned to pick my battles in this world, otherwise you fight and you fight and one day you look in the mirror and there's an old man looking back at you and you have to ask yourself was it all worth it?
It's been thirty six hours!

I'm going to say something to you that's been said to me by every person I've ever loved.  I'm really disappointed in you, you are pathetic and weak and I don't love you anymore, get out!

Have you even babyproofed your apartment or learned how to change a diaper?
  Aren't there instructions on the box?

You want to know the weird defect you both have that made you screw up like this? 
  Please.
You're both human.
    Janitors aren't human.
They are.  And Elliot, I'm really annoyed with you because I gave you this lecture two weeks ago.

Janitors don't whine.  Oh, wait, yes we do.  That's our thing.

You know, JD, you were the one who told me to get my life together in the first place.
  Yeah but I never thought you'd do it.
That's a lovely sentiment.

Damnit, the next time you guys get pastry crumbs all over my car you had better bring a scone for the driver!

(As for me I always assumed growing up happened automatically as you got older.  But it's really something you have to choose to do.  I guess I'm finally on my way.)

He looks like dad.
  I know.

More Scrubs Quotes

THINK IT IS OBVIOUS THAT THE VOTING SYSTEM NEEDS TO BE REVISED. iF IT IS A POPULARITY CONTEST OPPOSED TO DANCING TALENT THEN IT IS A JOKE. pERHAPS THE AUDIENCE COULD BE THE DECIDING VOTE.

Wow, lousy episode all around.  Usually the birth of a baby is a good episode, but this one just had nothing going for it.  That whole "Am I a bad person for breaking up with the mother of my baby who I don't love" storyline just doesn't sit well with me. 

(My last few days have all started the same.  Saying this to Kim,) You're amazing! (And then whispering this,) I love you, (to our baby and hoping that Kim wasn't wondering why I hadn't said the same thing to her.)

He doesn't want to be treated by interns, with the i dotted with a little heart and a little frownie face at the end.  It's incredible.  Your handwriting's actually more annoying than your voice.

Regardless, you interns are the future of this hospital.  If you don't treat patients, you won't learn.  What I want you to do is walk over to Mr. Setzer and say these words, "I'm your doctor.  Deal with it."  Can you say that? 

Why you looking so sad, Vanilla Wafer?

Is Izzie in her room?
  (Turk hadn't checked, so he had a 50/50 chance of answering correctly.)
    Sleeping like an angel.
Really?  Because she's on my back!
  (That's unfortunate.)

Carla let him finish!
  You can have it.
Family comes first, Turk.

That's my baby pager.  I'm having a baby!
  Oh my god I'm gonna be a bluncle!

I understand you'll be wanting an epidural?
  Yes.  But I hate pain so much I'm hoping there's a pill you can give me so that getting the epidural itself won't hurt.

Why does she think I'm joking?  I hate her and her chipmunky face.
  Kim your quiet voice is a little louder than usual.

I'll be in charge of the epidural and as soon as you're ready I'll have you so numb you'll feel like you're passing a marshmallow.
  But that sounds sticky and uncomfortable!
Passing a unicorn.
  That's a big horse with a horn!
Passing a rainbow.
  That's better.

Over the next couple of years plenty of doctors and going to be poking and prodding her, and I would like her to see me as her father and not another white coat that she will forever associate with pain.
  Totally legitimate argument, if three month olds didn't have the memory of an earthworm.

I would, Turkleton, but I only play Pacman and that carjack game.  There's nothing like scoring a caddy and mowing down street ho's.

What are your thoughts on cloth diapers?  Because if we got black ones with orange spots our kid would look like Bam Bam.

All the best there, Kim.  Please note the entire world is hoping that all the dominant genes are yours.

(There's no way Kim remembers what we were talking about.  Hell I don't even remember what we were talking about.)  What were we talking about?
  I was asking how you're feeling about us.
(Damnit!)

I've been working up the courage to tell you that I'm falling-
  Don't say it!
Why not?
  I think you're amazing, I'm just not ready to say it back yet.
That makes sense.  I really hurt you, it makes sense that you would need more time to get there.
  (Bullet dodged.)
Ah what the hell.  JD, I love you.
  Cool.

We heard that you were waiting for the pediatrician.  He's at home, so we paged him and he said we should give your daughter the shot ourselves.
  There is no way in hell that I'm letting an incompetent intern touch my child.
But you said that we are the future of the hospital and we need to learn.
  You need to learn on patients not related to me.  Ones that I don't care if you kill or maim.

Ok all we have to do here is kill space goblins.
  And what's my motivation?
Your motivation is to kill space goblins.

Forgive me, space goblin.  If it were not for the novice setting and the 10 cups of coffee I had earlier today you might have bested me in the marsh of Kathrik.  We're not too different, you and I, despite your arm mounted cannon and your insatiable taste for human flesh.
  You realize while you're talking his alien buddies are shooting you in the face?
Well that's just rude.

So you think you could ever be in love with me?
  (Let it go, woman!)  Kim let's focus on having a baby.
Answer the question.
  (Lie to her.)
And don't lie to me.
  Look I think you're amazing, right?  I think I've mentioned that.  And even though I'm not in love with you right now, I really hope I wake up one day feeling what you said you feel even though I kinda asked you not to say it.
Do you really hope that?
  With all my heart.
Because I always dreamed of finding a guy who hoped he could fall in love with me someday.
  Really?  That's kinda weird.

There's a lot of guys out there who think I'm a good catch!  The words "cute as a button" have been thrown around on more than one occasion!
  I know, Kim.  You're amazing.
Stop calling me amazing!

Would you even be with me if I wasn't dropping this kid?
  I don't know how to answer that.
I think you just did.  You know what?  We're done.

I deserve to be with somebody who doesn't cross his fingers and hope that he falls in love with me, maybe, someday.

I hate you so much right now JD!
  Don't worry, all women say that stuff during labor, she doesn't mean it.
I do.  He just broke up with me.
  What?
    Nono, technically I didn't break up with her, I just told her I don't love her.
      Who did he say that to?
  The mother of his baby!

Man, she looks familiar.

Look I know that I called you at home and threatened to kill your dog, but thanks for coming in Dr. Callahan.
  No problem, it's not like you need a lot of sleep to practice medicine on small children.

I can't believe you're stlll playing this stupid game.
  Hit him with the fire sabre!
    Hit him with the lamp.
      There's no lamp in this game, sir.
    I was talking to your wife.  Hit Turkleton with this lamp.

I would give her a shot, Perry, but this is scotch and I'm all Hasselhoffed out.

That sounded like criticism, and I don't respond well to criticism.
  Whatever, you still suck.
I'm out.

Oh, that's disgusting!
  Hey Keith.
Burn in hell.

You're having a baby!  Want to do a celebratory jump hug?
  Nah, Turk Carla and I tried one earlier?  Turned out to be lame.
Oh please, you probably loved it and just don't want to admit it.
  (God she knows me!)

Do you have the time to give my daughter a shot now that you've ruined your life?
  Will you talk me through what I'm going through?
Absolutely not.

But if you use the words "emotional rollercoaster" I am O U T.
  Deal.  I just feel like I'm on this emotional……ride.

I swear you could line up a hundred gay men and Harrison would pick out the attention starved bipolar ex-con every time.

Of course you had to break up with him, no one you love should ever sell your car without asking and then blow the money on meth.

You're a piece of crap!
  You're doing great!
I hate your hair.
  Impossible, nobody does.

Are you two ready to be parents?
  (And right then I couldn't help but wonder…are you ever?)

More Scrubs Quotes

It's apopularity contest and has little to do with talent. So, the hacks like Marie and Jane will stay due to the viewing audience graphics, the same middle aged women who watched their tired tv shows will vote for them out of loyalty. How about the body on Edyta!!!

the episode is solid. people are just upset that jd and eliot didnt get together. it was well written and the episode ended perfectly.

ps dong sleeping

Yeah, it's a bummer part of these reality shows that really emphasizes the whole "audience support base" thing. Much like happens each season in American Idol, this is the episode where they said "Ok, the acknowledged best dancer is gone, now please tune in next week to pick your favorite from who's left."

I'm totally shocked!!!! I thought for sure she was in the end! If anything I thought Helio would go home this week or Marie..but certainly NOT Sabrina!! Something is defintily not right here!

I think that she was so much better than Marie or Jane. And she has been consistantly good, unlike some others I could mention. I want her back.

Wow, that's different. Right up there with Daughtry's elimination from American Idol comes this. Who went home this week, Marie? Jane? Nope.

Sabrina.

The Cheetah Girl.

The one that everybody pretty much had as a lock for the finale, if not to win the whole thing.

The big question is, what happened? How could they fall right off the list so quickly? Like Daughtry and other American Idol "sure things", did people just forget to vote for her because she was such a shoe-in? Or was there a deliberate backlash because it was becoming too lopsided? If you believe the whole show is fixed, did Disney pull the plug on their planted superstar because it was a little too obvious?

That's a real shame, she was easily the best dancer in the bunch. I just hope this doesn't mean that Mel is at the top of the heap now, she does nothing for me. The only reason I tolerate her is because Maksim has become more of a character than she is.