Have I mentioned lately that my wife likes things grilled? She's all about the year round grilling. Which is fine by me, really, when weather permits. So when she said that we were grilling for dinner tonight it didn't dawn on me until too late that over the last week we've gotten a good foot of snow. I call her on the phone to tell her this while I'm driving home, and she goes over to the porch to survey the situation. "Looks fine," she says.

Looks fine, I come to learn, means that the grill is surrounded by a foot-high snowdrift on all sides. The side facing the house, where I would normally stand, is completely ice due to the gutter dripping down on it. This is going to be fun.

This is a precarious spot. I am standing on an icy hill, sloping down toward an open flame that will soon heat in excess of 500 degrees. This is not terribly smart. So I have perched myself with one foot braced back against the house, and one foot planted up against a wheel of the grill to avoid this happening. It is not a comfortable position, and certainly not the sort of summertime "hang out on the porch with a beer until the chicken's done" kind of time. I carefully step out, position myself so I don't do a faceplant into the flames, check the chicken, and then retrace my steps backwards to the house.

Elizabeth, my 2yr old, has locked me out of the house.

It's a sliding door, you see, which I have closed completely so that the kids who like to stand in the door and watch Daddy will not freeze. It does not take Elizabeth long to experiment with the little foot switch she sees Daddy step on, which locks the door. And, of course, she's incapable of pressing the unlock mechanism. Meanwhile Kerry is upstairs with the baby, I've got a plate in one hand covered in raw chicken bits and another hand with my grill tongs. I try to explain to Katherine, my 4 year old, how to unlock the door but she's not good in tense situations. Finally she just goes to get Kerry, who thankfully does not choose this opportunity to be funny, and lets me back in the house. 🙂